I was sexually abused at a young age and quickly learned how to keep secrets. I was molested, abused, and raped multiple times throughout my life and used drugs, alcohol, and self-harm to cope. I also attended a strong performance-based school where I developed an eating disorder. I was barely surviving and constantly looking for ways to numb myself, yet I gave off the appearance that I was living the perfect life. I was very alone and isolated by my secret life and was constantly struggling with depression and suicidal ideation. God was someone I knew of, but despised, because so many of my abusers came from the church. I believed the church was my enemy, but I remained active and involved, so I was totally miserable. While at a conference, I met Nancy and heard about Mercy. Mercy seemed to provide something different and it sparked hope deep within me. I wanted the healing and Jesus that Nancy talked about to be true, so I decided to apply.
While at Mercy, I learned that I can choose life and have it more abundantly! I learned to forgive the church, my abusers, and everyone who let me down. I realized God wasn’t the author of my pain, but through Him, I could have power, love, and sound thinking. My relationship with my parents has been restored and God has started building a firm foundation in me.
I plan on taking the next year to just lay low, study the Word of God, and stay active in ministry. In the future, I want to speak to the nations and declare God’s justice to those who are suffering. I want to be a voice that brings change and to see mighty miracles happen throughout the earth. My life has truly been totally transformed!